RiverNaija

On a beautiful Sunday morning during a church service, a pastor gave a message he said was from God to every member in attendance. Pastor told his parishioners that God had given an instruction that when every member got back home, they should lift up their one big nagging problem before God in a special prayer accompanied with prophetic dancing. According to the pastor, God promised to turn their mourning into dancing. A male member of the church, who was in attendance without his wife, got home with holy anger, bear-hugged his wife, picked her up and started dancing while speaking in unknown tongues. Curious wife who had neither danced nor hugged her husband in two years blushed in excitement and joy after the drama and then asked: “Honey, today’s service must have been very great, what got you so excited about me?” The husband replied; “Well, the pastor told us that when we get home, we should lift up one nagging problem we face in life before God. That’s what I just did”. T...

There is nothing like a perfect marriage in today’s world plagued with mysteries and uncertainties. Nonetheless, when there is openness, sincerity and trust; love can certainly conquer all. Marriage is the beginning of a partnership journey which involves several complicated dynamics in itself; unfortunately today many couples also carry pains and distress into their marriages, sometimes so pervasive and emotional that it can be internally damaging too. Shame is contagious The presence of shame can sometimes be traced back to childhood traumas where many couples had developed a shameful core which has continued to dominate their minds, bodies and souls; affecting their thoughts and feelings in their adult lives today. Living with the feeling of shame can be contagious and can quickly flitter and destroy the spirit of love in your marriage, so contagious that it can hold back all your hopes and aspirations too. Shame is real Everyone must have experienced a form of shame or anot...

The ‘cut and join’ carpenter is an ever-present metaphor of every instance of atrocious tinkering with most things that matter to us. It is ultimately a curiosity that reflects our national penchant for ad hoc solutions, short cuts, shoddiness and a general distaste for rigour even in important things. In street parlance, we are talking of the ‘any how’ and ‘anything goes’ syndrome in our national culture. After all, this is Nigeria, we casually declare, while expecting the same results as other nations who have done their homework. We even expect the rest of the world to lower standards, bend established rules to accommodate our untidy manners and even clap for us for ‘trying’. So, the ‘cut and join’ politician, judge or legislator etc. fall in line with their shoddy artisanal compatriots as typically Nigerian creatures. On the current public and private quarrels with President Buhari’s cabinet nominations and their microwave Senate confirmations, we all-President, parliament, the co...

Perhaps, one of the factors responsible for the progressive worsening of ‘cult’ related violence in cities across Nigeria is the confusion around what is cultism; who is a cultist and what is inherently bad about cultism in the context of our differing historical and cultural experiences? For those who think, is it really necessary getting the name right? After all, a sour orange is sour irrespective of the name you give it. Definitions reflect the idiosyncrasies, prejudices and emotions of the person offering them and in the public policy space, except a problem is properly defined, proffered solutions are always going to be askew, and nowhere is this starker than the criminal justice sector in Nigeria. Conceptual clarity around ‘cult’ and ‘cultism’ is important if we as a nation will stop the mindless violence that has blighted our centres of higher learning and has now entered our streets, decimating young people. No doubt, there are federal and state legislation criminalising memb...